Seeking Scarecrow or Cowardly Lion. I like long walks down yellow brick roads. Have fear of flying monkeys and tiny dogs carried in picnic baskets. Am not a fan of women with green faces and long noses. Do not enjoy water sports of any kind.

Favorite vacation spot: Emerald City
Favorite activity: Chopping down trees
Most treasured possession: Oil can
Organ I wish I possessed: Heart

Call 1-555-TIN-MANN if interested.